The last few weeks I've been on a constant quest to make myself truly happy. I generally try to be a happy and optimistic person... but I also know life isn't perfect. I've tried all kinds of things, and recently, I always feel like there's a little something missing. However, for the longest time, I couldn't put my finger on what it was.
“We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have."
I started off by learning more about myself... Such as my likes and dislikes. I decided to make a list of silly little things that make me happy:
Kiwi Strawberry Snapple
Blue Raspberry Jolly Ranchers
Hugs
Starburst Jelly Beans
Pictures of fun memories
Colorful sharpies
Minty gum
My HOT PINK laptop
Zupa's sandwiches
A nice text message
Sweat pants
Writing (blogs, news, etc.)
Meeting new people
Dancing around for no reason
Smiles from strangersSunshine and warm weather
Surprises
Good songs on the radio
Hot chocolate
A good book
Chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream
Cookie dough
"Miss Me" jeans
My senior sweatshirt
"10 Things I Hate About You"
Cinnamon sugar or blueberry bagels
A song with clever lyrics
"My Life is Average"
Goldfish
Orange Juice
My 3 glow fish
Ted (my childhood teddy bear)
Belting the lyrics to a favorite musical
It was great to realize things that I like and that will make me momentarily happy. That got me thinking though... what about when I'm not happy? How do I make myself happy then?
Here are a few simple things to keep in mind:
You can't change a lot of things... so build a bridge and get over it! It's easier said than done (believe me, I know), but it's a lot healthier than holding on to a lot of unhappiness and negativity.
Negativity... is unattractive and unbecoming. Stay clear of it.
Mind your manners... A lot of times if we're having a bad day or something doesn't go the way we planned we take it out on people around us. This can make you look rude, but more importantly, it can ruin someone else's day.
Take a deep breath... Don't confront someone when you're angry or upset. Wait to cool off. Nine times out of ten, once you're calmed down, you'll regret the things you said and did while you were angry.
The Golden Rule... Sometimes we like to gossip or talk about others behind their backs... especially if we don't like someone or if we feel like we've been wronged. We're all guilty of this, but it doesn't make it right. If someone starts it, diffuse it by saying something nice about the person that is being talked about. Don't you hope someone would be courteous enough to do the same for you?
Mind your own bees wax.... You don't need to go looking for a reason to be angry or gossipy.
Learn from others' mistakes... Remember that time someone did or said something that tore your heart in two? Don't do it to someone else in the future; That's called being a hypocrite. We go through a lot of things so that we can be prepared to serve others in the future. Don't make the same mistakes as those who hurt you.
Give the benefit of the doubt... A lot of times there are people around us who do things that hurt our feelings. However, half the time, they aren't thinking, and years down the road you won't care anyway.
Staying happy, even when it's hard, and remembering the little things that keep us happy are both essential. However, there is one sure way of being truly happy, and I was slightly embarrassed that I hadn't thought of it before.
It's so simple that it's sometimes easy to forget...
It's not all about me... After some fasting and praying a few Sundays ago, I came to several conclusions about what I was missing. I was focusing on what made me happy...what made me feel good... what made me look good... I'd forgotten what I had been counciled by a wise friend to do... to go forth with great love and joy in my soul... to serve others.
The key to happiness isn't about my favorite flavor of jolly rancher or if the sun is shining today. Though those are nice things, there's is so much more to it. It's about how I used my day. It needs to be about blessing the lives of others. The thing that was missing was service.
In Matthew 10:39 it says: "He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it."
These videos are from the "Mormon Messages" YouTube site, and they are great reminders of what we need to be doing.
I've found that my quest is ongoing and that I will seek many things throughout my life. However, I feel blessed with the knowledge that true happiness can only come through the Gospel of Jesus Christ and by following his council:
"As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love. If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father’s commandments, and abide in his love. These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full. This is my commandment, That ye love one another, as I have loved you." -John 15:9-12
I don't know about you, but starting tomorrow I'm going to "wake up, and do something more." :)
